In this modern day age and world, I know that the likelihood of a 24 year old budding journalist ending up as head of a state is extremely unlikely (not impossible, just unlikely). Especially if you, as I, would rather be without politicians and think that the ways of yore probably weren't all that bad anyways and a monarchy sounds like all fun and good times.

But should some odd case of (un)fortunate events occur, and I end up on a throne with a scepter in my hand, and the power to do what I wanted because I "felt like it", I have one thing to say: Be afraid! Be very afraid!

Because I would be a tyrant. I have come to that conclusion myself and can honestly say that it doesn't really bother me. Oh, I'd probably attempt all the goodie-two-shoes stuff for a couple of weeks, perhaps a month, but then the heads would begin to roll.

The reason? Morons.
On a daily level I am stomped by the complete lack of sense in some people. It gets so bad at times, that I feel I have more in common with inanimate objects than with my fellow man. Worse yet, it makes me feel old, grumpy and decrepit.

To take an example:
This morning, when I was sitting in the bus heading for work, we pull over to gather up some more passengers. Some guy comes running towards the bus, but the busdriver has a schedule to hold, so he has to close the doors and keep going. Which is good for me, because otherwise I would've been late.
The guy on the sidewalk then proceeds to slap his hand forcefully against the side of the bus and yells "f-BLEEP you, you idiot!"
While his frustration is understandable - hell we've all been in a situation where we missed the bus - his outburst just gave me the urge to kneecap the bugger. Or at least forcefully suggest that he keep silent and try to be on time the next time. The world does not revolve around him (it revolves around me, we all know that.)

If I was King... guys like him, who believe they are the center of the universe, would be first against the wall.

[I have come to realize I might need a rather long wall, if I ever became king. This one might suffice.]

Right alongside the fellow who invented the "push button to cross street" concept. Oh yes, you heard me. The daft twit (excuse my language) who decided that there's a dire need for pedestrians to push a button to cross the street at a traffic light.

When, in the recorded history of man, has there ever been a need for pedestrians to stand at a junction and wait, only to *not* cross the street? I don't have an exact count at the amount of times I've stood like a planted tree wondering why the little man in the traffic light was red, and the rest of the lights pointing in my general direction where green... but I can guarantee you, that the number is nearing three digits at an alarming rate. Of course this might just be a danish thing, in which case it's just nation-wide stupidity to keep it around. Not worldwide.

So there it is. If I was King, morons and the guy who invented the button-crossing-concept (and who, in my book, incidentally fall into the same category at the first group of people) will be first against the aforementioned wall...

Oh, and arrogant bus-drivers who close the doors and leave, just as you come running towards the bus. I hate that.

- Thorsten

P.S.
Fifth cup of coffee, and the world is starting to seem just a wee bit more manageable.